It has been a year since I last visited my own blog. Don't quite know why. But here I am again - back in my Garden, with a resolve that I will keep it well watered regularly!
This will be the fourth Christmas without Julius. But Christmas has not even crossed our minds, simply because we had a far bigger appointment to keep.
A summons...
to court…
We have been called to an examination of discovery.
Even though I knew this day was coming, it did not stop me from being filled with dread. A lengthy prep meeting with our lawyer seemed to make it even more ominous and heavy.
We have been asked to remember. The wound that I thought was healed in part, was ripped open sharply. I find myself grieving all over again - re-living the horror and shock.
The only way I could go through this exercise was to remember all the promises that Our Gracious God had given us along the way.
The first promise was the day of May 7, 2013. A day that had started just fine, ended so tragically. I remember being rushed to the hospital in the police cruiser, my daughter sitting in the back. I opened my bible and read, as loud as I could, so she could hear. Over and over again, I read:
“fear not, for I am with you;
be not dismayed, for I am your God;
I will strengthen you, I will help you,
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41: 10
I came back to this passage this past week. I had heard a very encouraging sermon by John Piper that had brought even more strength and meaning to these verses. If you are reading this page, perhaps you will be encouraged too.
In these verses God commands you
not to fear or be dismayed because…
He is with you
He is your God
He will strengthen you
He will help you
He will uphold you.
In the book of Isaiah 41, the prophet is describing a courtroom. The court is in session and God - the Supreme Judge is calling the whole world to a trial. He has the power to call this session because He is the Judge of all the earth. “To me every knee shall bow, every tongue shall swear allegiance” Is 45:23. Dear reader this is the absolute truth - there is a day when Jesus will return as Judge of all the earth.
Secondly God uses whomever He chooses. In this case it was Cyrus the Persian king who was empowered to fight Babylon and to break down the idols of the nations. Jesus is “King of Kings. Lord of Lords.” Rev 19:16. Remember God is sovereign over all. Never doubt His plans and His power. He will bring His plans to fruition and the outcome will always be according to His plan.
Thirdly God is the Creator. “Have you not known? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth, He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable.” Is 40:28. Loved one - He has no beginning and no end. This is the God who watches over you. Human legal systems have only obvious evidence to work with - Our God sees the motives of the heart and only He judges righteously.
Fourthly God affirms His own people. 'You are My servant, I have chosen you and not rejected you.’" The prophet describes the response of the unrepentant peoples. They try to encourage each other. “Be strong” they say. They look at their own feeble attempts and say “It is good.” How often over these years I have been told “Be strong.” I have nothing in me to be strong in the face of this loss and trial. None of my attempts can change an iota of what happened or bring resolution and healing to my soul. We all need someone stronger than ourselves, some one who has power, some one who loves us infinitely more than we can comprehend, who has our best interests at heart. We need Jesus Himself.
While the nations seek help from their idols, God comforts His people.
To quote Pastor John Piper in his sermon:http://www.desiringgod.org/messages/fear-not-i-am-with-you-i-am-your-god
“The God who judges all the earth and calls the coastlands to give account . . .
▪ The God who rules the rulers of history . . .
▪ The God who calls the nations of earth into being because he is first and last . . .
▪ The God who calls his own people and makes himself their God freely and graciously . . .
That God says to us who believe,
▪ I am your God.
▪ I am with you.
▪ I will strength you.
▪ I will help you.
▪ I will uphold you”.
Loved one - do you know this God? Have your considered His call to you? You cannot claim a promise unless you respond to His call. Have you truly surrendered your life to Him and acknowledged that He is the One who governs history and He is the righteous Judge before whom you will one day stand? Do you know that you can never measure up to His standard of Holiness - none of your traditions or church attendance will count when you stand before the throne on judgement day. There is one way that He has provided and that is through His Son Jesus. “And there is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved.” Acts 4:12.
If you know Jesus as your personal Lord and Saviour, will you join me in believing His promise to you. When we came out of the Examination, much like Joshua and Caleb we could affirm - the enemy is big - this trial is huge, but Our God is bigger. We will not fear because Our God is with us, He will strengthen us, help us and uphold us.
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